Well in a super bad mood! And i need to take it out.. guess I am tired of crying my heart out to my SOUL - MATES... i think i'd share it on my blog now...
Oh common I don't really have anything to write about ( life's getting boring!).. n no alcohol to get me out of this misery!!
But well on a contemplative state of mind that my anger has put me into .. and for those who are just tuning in....here's a recap of my life 2008-2009......
LIFE CHANGING TYPE THINGS:
Went to the US of A!!! - San Fran, NY, LA, LV, SD... sigh sigh sigh :-(
Lived with FEMALE roommates! ( was tuffff..!! )
Got my hair coloured RED ( hey! its a big deal.. n i loved it!!)
Sky Dived!!! Yipeeeeeee.........
Had an ALIGATOR! ( oh well n the painful allergy post luncheon & making Dang run around ! )
Kissed under a tree and looked out into the open sky through its leaves!
Las Vegas!!!
Lap Dance!!!! exciting!
Learnt the BIKE ( PULSAR - MH12-BA-3238 - what a rush!!!)
Phantom of Opera - Times Square!!!
Had two crushes! ( Phew.. finally!)
Almost, I meet someone new.
Hurt some dear ones..... and I am still sorry!
Cried a bit... n a bit more...and a bit bit more.....and a bit bit bit more...n more...n more...n more...
Had a cigarette.
Had a cigar!! ( CUBAN! )
Smoked POT!!! ( well no i dint get high!! ) & Hash brownies.
Decorated a Christmas tree!
Ice skated!! ( my bum still hurts!)
Drove an AUDI!! ( sexy mama! )
Pink Ipod!
Pierre Cardin Watch.
2 Laptops!!
Made two dear frnds! :-).....i love them!
Gave my GMAT! (Phew!)
Started Loving beer!
Fell in love with Kolkata! Durga pujo!
Waxed!!!
Miss dear frnds. ( Anand & Dangu... life sucks without u too.... )
Harshal got dearer!
Ups and Downs with NEil... and finally CLARITY!
SURFING!! ( awesome fun!)
Rock Band & Wii
Was back with Family.
Dad said he is proud of me! :-)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Bro and me back to fighting over remote! he he he he.....
JACK!! ( my poison!)
SUSHI!!!! i love it!
STAR BUCKS.. COLD STONE!
VICTORIA'S SECRET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BIKiNi...
Hawaii...
Night shifts!
Midnight buffets! cofee at 3.. Lonavala at 5, bf buffet.......leaving chappal in a five star! :-)
Goldfish
My blog! :-)
THINGS I HAVEN'T LEART:
How to fight loneliness.
How to travel by train.
How to drive a car in traffic.
How to be rude.
How to get rid of wierd men who try to pick you up.
How to be a woman and get what I want!!!!
How to wear a strapless bra! ( god they are uncomfortable! )
How to love my work!
How to fall sick several times a year...
How to survive a gynac test!
And I learnt a little bit more... i learnt to mend relations, learnt to say sorry, learnt to let go, learnt to eat lunch alone, learnt to survive weekends over home, learnt to make random conversations, learnt to not do anything, learnt to cry through the night without letting any one know & learnt that i still could fall for someone......
PS: Well I guess this blog might be further updated with still about one and half months left for 2009 to come to an end!! :-)
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
To dear Manu... with love
I crossed him and felt a familiar presence,
I turned to look back and our eyes held each other..
For a long time I looked into his eyes.. they were brown with stories to tell..
And there it was.. taking birth deep in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks..
I could see myself in his tears...
I loved him and was oh so possessive about him!! He was my Knight in shining armor - tall, dark, handsome, with strong muscular arms and a taut, lean slender body. Every time he held my hand or prepped by my waist onto his bicycle,I felt like his princess.
He was all I needed and he would protect me from everything - or so I thought at that time. With two plaits, black ribbons in my hair, my short skirt flirting in the air and my shiny black boots i used to wait eagerly for him to arrive. He used to greet me with a familiar tring tring of his bicycle ring.. That was my call and i knew it so well.. he had come for me... I would quickly check myself in the mirror, tidy my already neat hair and go running down the stairs right into his arms. "U look beaaaUtiful my princess" he would greet and I could not stop blushing.
We traveled so many years of our lives together... through sunshine rain and winter. In rains, he would guide the cycle with one hand, the other hand holding an umbrella firmly over my head. He would be drenched with his shirt sticking to his lean body like skin..but would not let a drop fall over me. He was my companion, my soul mate and a friend.I would speak and he would listen, I would sing and he would hum, I would cry and he would say "its all right", I would laugh and he would laugh louder, "I love you... Manu" i would say...
"Mummum" the feeble voice called.... the voice so familiar and yet so different, yet so distant. He was old. His teeth yellow and stained with tobacco - the tobacco that he chewed too much to kill the hunger in his stomach. His rough skin pale and lifeless stretched like a thin tissue over his weak bones. He stood up with great difficulty, his movements slow and clumsy and he stood before me with tired folded hands. "Mummum" he called out once again. My eyes deceived me in recognizing him and my memory failed to place him. " I am Manu... Manu da...I used to ride you to school everyday.. when you were a lil princess...we would hide and eat golas by the road and struggle hard wash out the color from our mouths lest ur mother found out.....i am Manu..YOUR Manu.. My years of growing up, lost innocence, friends, parties, lovers and the different places I traveled failed me from recognizing him who was once everything to me. Memories filled my eart and my throat and they hurt my eyes.
I turned to look back and our eyes held each other..
For a long time I looked into his eyes.. they were brown with stories to tell..
And there it was.. taking birth deep in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks..
I could see myself in his tears...
I loved him and was oh so possessive about him!! He was my Knight in shining armor - tall, dark, handsome, with strong muscular arms and a taut, lean slender body. Every time he held my hand or prepped by my waist onto his bicycle,I felt like his princess.
He was all I needed and he would protect me from everything - or so I thought at that time. With two plaits, black ribbons in my hair, my short skirt flirting in the air and my shiny black boots i used to wait eagerly for him to arrive. He used to greet me with a familiar tring tring of his bicycle ring.. That was my call and i knew it so well.. he had come for me... I would quickly check myself in the mirror, tidy my already neat hair and go running down the stairs right into his arms. "U look beaaaUtiful my princess" he would greet and I could not stop blushing.
We traveled so many years of our lives together... through sunshine rain and winter. In rains, he would guide the cycle with one hand, the other hand holding an umbrella firmly over my head. He would be drenched with his shirt sticking to his lean body like skin..but would not let a drop fall over me. He was my companion, my soul mate and a friend.I would speak and he would listen, I would sing and he would hum, I would cry and he would say "its all right", I would laugh and he would laugh louder, "I love you... Manu" i would say...
"Mummum" the feeble voice called.... the voice so familiar and yet so different, yet so distant. He was old. His teeth yellow and stained with tobacco - the tobacco that he chewed too much to kill the hunger in his stomach. His rough skin pale and lifeless stretched like a thin tissue over his weak bones. He stood up with great difficulty, his movements slow and clumsy and he stood before me with tired folded hands. "Mummum" he called out once again. My eyes deceived me in recognizing him and my memory failed to place him. " I am Manu... Manu da...I used to ride you to school everyday.. when you were a lil princess...we would hide and eat golas by the road and struggle hard wash out the color from our mouths lest ur mother found out.....i am Manu..YOUR Manu.. My years of growing up, lost innocence, friends, parties, lovers and the different places I traveled failed me from recognizing him who was once everything to me. Memories filled my eart and my throat and they hurt my eyes.
I asked him how he was. His tired eyes, his tired body , his tired voice and his tired soul answered my question. He said he was fine and tried hard to manage a smile. His smile, still the same.. still filling up his face and sparkling up those eyes.. just the way it used to in his yester days! "I am fine but old.." he said " but look at you.. you have grown to be a fine woman my princess... and you look beaaaUtiful..". I dint blush anymore ( lost innocence !!! ) . He said " I am old and I am tired but now that you have grown and I have found you back, you ll look after me my dear... I am sure you will take care of me now." The guilt in my heart did not let me look into his eyes, the lump in my throat would not let me speak, I felt like I betrayed him.. let him down.. let him be lonely and alone so long - let his life be the cheap alcohol, the tobacco, his hunger, his loneliness and his tears. I was too busy growing up to not think of him ever. I was too ashamed to say I am sorry, too ashamed to offer him money, too ashamed to hug him and say "I love you". I bought him food and we ate - he ate!! He ate like a baby, he ate with greed, he ate with hunger and i watched him eat. After the meal, i promised him I would meet him again.. got myself to give him some money and turned around to walk away. I walked slow, but every flesh in my body wanted to run...i turned the corner of the road, till he could no longer see me, and i did what i do best.. I RAN and I RAN and I RAN...
Manu died the next day.....
I dint know.. i dint see him.. they told me someone found some money in his torn pockets and gave him a modest funeral...
someone sprinkled his warm ashes over the cool waters....
Manu my Knight in shining armour died last week.
- Manu......my dear Manu............... I love you.
Manu died the next day.....
I dint know.. i dint see him.. they told me someone found some money in his torn pockets and gave him a modest funeral...
someone sprinkled his warm ashes over the cool waters....
Manu my Knight in shining armour died last week.
- Manu......my dear Manu............... I love you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
